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Mark
Simmons

As Seen on Mock The Week, BT Sport and ITV, ‘Master of one-liners’ Mark Simmons brings his brand-new show on the road. Here, he chats to us about the show which comes to Komedia, Bath on 6th June

We are looking forward to seeing you come to Komedia for your ‘Quip Off The Mark’ tour. What can we expect from the show.

 

Jokes, jokes & more jokes. I do one-liners so if you’re looking for a high gag to pound sterling ratio I’m your man. My favourite part of the act to perform is when I do jokes on random subject suggested by the audience. I especially like it when it’s a left field suggestion. I was recently in Australia, someone shouted ‘Bare foot bowls” which we don’t have in the UK.

“I was actually going to try bare foot bowls, but I got cold feet”

How has the tour been going so far? 

 

It’s been so much fun. People have started calling it the Bob Dylan tour because it never ends. It started September 2022 with a modest number of dates but because of the amazing support I’ve been getting on social media, more and more people want to come and see the show, so we’ve just put the 6th and 7th leg of the tour on sale. Sadly there will be no 8th leg, I like the sound of a spider tour.

 

I understand you were quite shy as a child, so was making people laugh a way of getting over that shyness?

 

I would always make my friends laugh but I wasn’t confident talking in front of large groups so it’s very weird that this is now my job. I think it’s the making people laugh bit that makes me feel comfortable up there.

“People used to say i’m an attention seeker, look at me now!”

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How did you feel when you first got up on stage to do your act?

 

I still can’t believe i tried it. My friend somehow convinced me to give it a go. I went on having never written a joke before but i’d say stage craft was probably my biggest weakness. 

“Apparently I spent the whole 5 minutes on stage telling my jokes whilst staring at the floor, after that things started to look up.”

 

At what stage did you realise you could do comedy full time?

 

Seann Walsh asked me to go on tour with him doing the support slot. I then had 50 guaranteed dates in the diary so I could take the risk and do it full time.

“It meant I could give up my job at a call centre answering a phone, well, it wasn’t for me”

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You were massively into sports as a youngster, so did the fact that you played sports (and you are a 3rd dan at taekwando) give you that competitive edge.

 

I think it definitely helps with the work ethic. I was always taught to practice practice practice and I use this mentality with the writing process. As a one-liner comedian you have to go through a lot of jokes before getting to the really good ones, so every day I write write write. 

“I knew I couldn't compete in Taekwondo forever but I did get a kick out of it” 

(This isn’t one of the good ones, you have to come to the tour show to get those)

 

It can also help with hecklers can’t it?

 

I guess it does in terms of being quicker than them but I don’t like to be combative with hecklers, I prefer to try to make friends with them so everyone has a nice time. 

“By the way, I’d like to give a shout out to all the hecklers”

"I was always taught to practice practice practice and I use this mentality with the writing process. As a one-liner comedian you have to go through a lot of jokes before getting to the really good ones, so every day I write write write."

You’ve become well known on social media for some of your one-liners and put downs. Has social media helped raise your stock?

 

Social media has changed the game in comedy. I love it because it allows people with the same sense of humour as me to discover my stand up and then come to live shows. That’s one of my favourite things about the tour is that I get to spend my evenings making poeple who love one-liners laugh.

 

Who makes you laugh?

 

I’ve always really liked Lee Mack. He’s considered the quickest wit in the UK and it’s a goal of mine to be as fast as him. 

 

Finally, what have you got planned for the rest of the year?

 

I’m very excited to finish this tour strong and then it’s sights firmly set on the next tour which I’m aiming for 2026. What i’m most looking forward to is doing the show for one final time in Bath. It’s the big one! Hopefully see you all there.

Win

For a chance to win two tickets to see Mark at Komedia, Bath on 6th June, simply click on the link below and follow the steps to enter...Good luck!

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